How confident are you? And how confident do you appear to others?
Confidence is a state of mind, a state of being. Confident people inspire confidence in others. Gaining confidence of others is one of the key ways in which you could help to keep your self confidence levels up.
Self confidence is a really important aspect in most of our lives yet so many people struggle to find it. The good news is is that self confidence can be learnt and built upon. However, it will take time and it will take effort but the rewards are well worth it.
Your level of confidence can show In different ways to people, through the way you hold yourself, your posture, the way you talk, your body language and so on.
So what are the signs of low self-esteem, or low confidence levels?
When someone pays you a compliment do you dismiss them as if it were nothing or do you accept the compliment graciously.
If you dismissed the compliment then you are suffering from low self-esteem.
Someone who is confident would be willing to take risks and go the extra mile to achieve better things, those who are low in self-confidence would feel more comfortable staying in their comfort zone, fearing things such as failure and therefore avoid taking risks.
Having a low self confidence in yourself can be very destructive not only to you, but to your health and to those around you, and it often manifests itself through negativity.
Low self esteem could come from a number of areas in someones life, if you are overweight, you may feel ugly, frumpy, upset with yourself with the way you are, or you may have been ‘dumped’ by a husband, wife or other, you feel unworthy, or you feel you get passed over in your job, even though you know you can do a more rewarding role
You will notice that confident people are more positive because they believe in themselves regardless of the situation, if they are overweight, they know what they need to do to combat it, or they are happy with how they are, and can deal with it, if they have been ‘dumped’ then it is the other persons loss not theirs, they move on to new relationships, but learn from the past, if its a job where you keep getting passed over, then leave for the job you know you are truly capable of, know your worth. People with confidence believe in their abilities and they also believe in living life to the fullest!
So, how can we build self-confidence?
Some people believe that self-confidence can be achieved and built through affirmations and positive thinking. There is some substance in this, but there are other ways in which you can build your self-confidence and as long as you have the focus and determination to carry things through then it is achievable. Your confidence comes from taking action.
When you set goals, and achieve those goals you become confident in yourself and confidence will build from there so let’s start with thinking about what’s important to you and where you want to go.
Where do you want to go and what do you want to achieve in your life? Achieving these goals is really key to this and knowing you’re ‘why’ your reason why you have to achieve these goals also help you overcome some of the struggles you come across when trying to achieve your goals and having a really strong reason also gives you the drive and confidence to step out of your comfort zone.
Setting goals is really important and it is imperative that you set realistic goals and steps in which you can achieve these goals. Make sure they are very small steps and that they are easily achievable.
You might want to look at your strengths and weaknesses. Marcus Buckingham advises you to work on your strengths and to leave your weaknesses alone. It’s very important to recognise what you are we can and recognise that there are others around you who are strong in those weeks strength that you have, and that you should use these people where they can help you improve your weaknesses.
You also need to start looking at your mindset and learning how to stop the negative self talk which can not only destroy your confidence back and also see you self-destruct.
There are also visualisation techniques, and hypnotherapy which can help you with changing your mind and thinking (we will go into this much later in my blog), but the most important one change that will absolutely help you in to improve your mindset and your self-confidence is personal development or self development, taking care of your body and eating healthy, with regular exercise, listening to motivational cd’s, audiobooks or even looking them up on YouTube.com for inspiration and motivation.
Improving your skills to develop a more confident you!
So if you identify the skills you need to develop in order to be more confident by looking at your goals, your strengths, and your weaknesses, you will know which ones you need to acquire confidently and well.
As long as you keep on stretching yourself enough, but not too much, you’ll find your self-confidence building apace. What’s more, you’ll have earned your self-confidence – because you’ll have put in the hard graft necessary to be successful!